AbFab Humour for Women 40 yrs Plus

Have you heard the one about....?

I decided to add this page as we all need a little humour in our lives. Laughter is positive energy, relieves stress, uses facial muscles to delay the sagging and ageing process and generally makes us just feel good

As the saying goes ....

A middle-aged woman seemed sheepish as she visited her gynecologist.

"Come now," coaxed the doctor, you've been seeing me for years! There's nothing you can't tell me."

"This one's kind of strange..."

"Let me be the judge of that," the doctor replied.

"Well," she said, "yesterday I went to the bathroom in the morning and heard a plink-plink-plink in the toilet and when I looked down, the water was full of pennies."

"I see."

"That afternoon I went to the bathroom again and, plink-plink-plink, there were nickels in the bowl."

"I see."

"That night," she went on, "I went again, plink-plink-plink, and there were dimes and this morning there were quarters ! You've got to tell me what's wrong with me!," she implored, I'm scared out of my wits!"

The gynecologist put a comforting hand on her shoulder. "There, there, it's nothing to be scared about." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (Ready for this?) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"You're simply going through the change!

After starting a new diet I altered my drive to work to avoid passing my favorite bakery. I accidentally drove by the bakery this morning and as I approached, there in the window were a host of goodies. I felt this was no accident, so I prayed ... "Lord, it's up to you, if you want me to have any of those delicious goodies, create a parking place for me directly in front of the bakery." And sure enough, on the eighth time around the block, there it was! God is so Good!"

Take one Weetbix.

Take an Aero chocolate bar.

Crumble the Aero over the Weetbix.

Voila!

AEROBIX !

One day, long, long ago there was this man who, surprisingly, was not full of shit........

But this was a long time ago..... and it was just ONE day!

The End

A man and his wife are awakened at 3 o'clock in the morning by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push.
"Not a chance," says the husband, "it is 3 o'clock in the morning!". He slams the door and returns to bed.
"Who was that?" asked his wife.
"Just some drunk guy asking for a push," he answers.
"Did you help him?" she asks.
"No, I did not, it's 3 o' clock in the morning and it is pouring out there!"
"Well, you have a short memory," says his wife. "Can't you remember about three months ago when we broke down, and those two guys helped us? I think you should help him, and you should be ashamed of yourself.

The man does as he is told, gets dressed, and goes out into the pounding rain. He calls out into the dark,
"Hello, are you still there?"
"Yes" comes back the answer.
"Do you still need a push?", calls out the husband.
"Yes, please!" comes the reply from the dark.
"Where are you?" asks the husband……………

"Over here on the swing!" replies the drunk

Check your volume and learn about Gloval Warming with The Menopause Song

And now for a bit of irritability - Is this menopause??

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